J.J. Redick shoots threes. Did he do that in the 90’s? It’s certainly possible. Let’s see if Redick can shine (by Collective Soul) some light on this.
That settles that. The 90s were, in fact, a crazy time. Remember the Backstreet Boys? Me neither.
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First of all: AOL. Ew. That was the first mistake right there. It was already the late 90s by the time JJ got this account. The Redick house really should have known better.
Secondly, I was really hoping that the “shoota” in his name was a cool 90s corruption of “shooter” instead of the verb “shoot” followed by the article “a.” People in the 90s loved replacing s’s with z’s at the end of plural words and turning “er” into “a” when the presented the opportunity. It was really awesome to do that. I bet being a self-described “shoota” would have really impressed all of JJ’s friends.
But given that the name was “shoot a” in JJ’s mind and not “shoota,” we’re going to have to analyze his grammar. He was a high school student at this point, and grammar is something that happens in high school English classes. The proper form is “JJ shoots a 3.” That deserves a red check mark. I looked up JJ Redick’s high school GPA school, but then I felt creepy and stopped. Let’s assume it was a 3.0.
Next: Steven Adams remembers the Backstreet Boys.
The final thing to take away from this is that it’s okay. It’s okay to have embarrassing moments in the 90s. I once bought a Savage Garden CD. But mistakes happen. The important thing to do is learn from our 1990’s mistakes and get better. Given that the 90s were a decade and a half ago, we can all agree enough time has passed to perfect ourselves. Mistakes should never happen again. If and when they do, we’ll be watching you, JJshoota3.