20 NFL players to help you survive the zombie apocalypse

Dec 24, 2022; Santa Clara, California, USA; San Francisco 49ers fullback Kyle Juszczyk (44) before the start of the first quarter against the Washington Commanders at Levi's Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Stan Szeto-USA TODAY Sports
Dec 24, 2022; Santa Clara, California, USA; San Francisco 49ers fullback Kyle Juszczyk (44) before the start of the first quarter against the Washington Commanders at Levi's Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Stan Szeto-USA TODAY Sports /
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Jason Kelce, Philadelphia Eagles
Jason Kelce, Philadelphia Eagles. (Photo by Scott Taetsch/Getty Images) /

NFL players to help you survive the zombie apocalypse: Jason Kelce, Philadelphia Eagles

If you wanted to form a team like this, you would have to have that one guy who would not only be crazy enough to fight zombies, but crazy enough to bring a cooler of beer along for the journey. Jason Kelce is going to kill some zombies, that’s for sure. But, he’s also going to celebrate a little bit after each stop along the way.

Kelce is the party animal who will also jump at the opportunity to throw a zombie to the ground like an opposing defensive lineman, and I’ll bet he knows how to operate the machinery needed to ensure that thing is dead and gone.

NFL players to help you survive the zombie apocalypse: Kyle Juszczyk, San Francisco 49ers

Fullbacks aren’t sexy. They’re also rarely used the way they used to be. But, Kyle Juszczyk is what I would call the NFL’s Swiss Army knife, and Kyle Shanahan gets to deploy him on a weekly basis. This man does anything asked of him. He does all of the dirty, ugly work that you don’t typically see when watching the game. Although, he’ll occasionally jump off the screen when he’s used in the passing game and continues to bowl over defenders.

You could line him up at any position on the football field, realistically, and he’ll probably know what to do. He’s one of the smartest, least-talked-about players in all of the NFL, yet continues to get league-wide recognition from those who know the game. I want a guy who is a jack of all trades helping me defeat zombies.