2013 NFL uniform power rankings (i.e. the Jaguars are the worst at everything)

Oct 3, 2013; Cleveland, OH, USA; Buffalo Bills running back Fred Jackson (22) celebrate after scoring a touchdown during the first quarter against the Cleveland Browns at FirstEnergy Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Andrew Weber-USA TODAY Sports
Oct 3, 2013; Cleveland, OH, USA; Buffalo Bills running back Fred Jackson (22) celebrate after scoring a touchdown during the first quarter against the Cleveland Browns at FirstEnergy Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Andrew Weber-USA TODAY Sports /
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We are more than a quarter of the way through the 2013 NFL season, which means football has essentially taken over your entire brain. You’ve seen the new jersey tweaks (or completely new jerseys altogether) and the familiar, tried-and-true uniforms have re-entered your life comfortably.

With five weeks to digest them all, it’s time to do what we all love the most: rank them (and then argue about it).

The Best of the Best

These are, by far, the best jerseys in the NFL today. Whether it’s a classic look or a tremendous redesign that is so good it could be a result of the direct will of a higher power, these are the NFL uniforms that stand tall above the rest.

Most of the elite uniforms you find here are relatively simple in design, reliant on excellent uses of color rather than inexplicable piping, bizarre pant designs and gradient helmets that could only be the result of a higher-up team executive who was on an acid trip at the wrong time.

Simplicity is just the right way to go when it comes to a uniform, which means Nike is out to ruin professional football forever.

1. Green Bay Packers

2. San Francisco 49ers

3. Buffalo Bills

4. Cleveland Browns

5. Kansas City Chiefs

6. Pittsburgh Steelers

7. Chicago Bears

8. Indianapolis Colts

The Rest of the Best

Keep in mind, there are some very good – even great – uniforms in this next grouping; they just don’t have that “elite” status yet. Here you’ll realize that you should reconsider Miami’s new uniforms and maybe take the Cowboys’ look off that pedestal.

And with so many big uniform changes this season, Minnesota’s matte helmets are flying under the radar, but they’re spectacular.

9. San Diego Chargers

10. Dallas Cowboys

11. Miami Dolphins

12. Oakland Raiders

13. New England Patriots

14. Minnesota Vikings

15. New York Jets

16. Baltimore Ravens

17. Arizona Cardinals

18. Detroit Lions

Middle of the Pack

For a lot of these teams, their uniforms are just sort of…there. Often okay but never great, these are teams that could use a tweak or two. Some have already tweaked their look or completely overhauled it, which puts them in a sort of uniform purgatory.

19. New Orleans Saints

20. New York Giants

21. Philadelphia Eagles

22. Houston Texans

23. Seattle Seahawks

24. Tampa Bay Buccaneers

25. Atlanta Falcons

26. Denver Broncos

27. St. Louis Rams

The Worst of the Worst

Welcome to the putrid, steaming pile of excrement that is the NFL’s worst collection of uniforms. You’ll find that the Washington Redskins are included here. Their color scheme is actually great (and their logo doesn’t seem to be overtly offensive), but with a name like that and the very real, very justified controversy surrounding it, it’s impossible to put them anywhere but second-to-last.

Because the Jacksonville Jaguars deserve to be last forever with those new uniforms. My God.

28. Carolina Panthers

29. Tennessee Titans

30. Cincinnati Bengals

31. Washington Redskins

32. Jacksonville Jaguars