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Phillies to begin selling wine and cocktails at concession areas

By Bret Greenleaf

Mar 20, 2014; Clearwater, FL, USA; Toronto Blue Jays outfielder Jose Bautista (19) stretches with the Phillie Phanatic before the start of the spring training exhibition game against the Philadelphia Phillies at Bright House Field. Mandatory Credit: Jonathan Dyer-USA TODAY Sports
Mar 20, 2014; Clearwater, FL, USA; Toronto Blue Jays outfielder Jose Bautista (19) stretches with the Phillie Phanatic before the start of the spring training exhibition game against the Philadelphia Phillies at Bright House Field. Mandatory Credit: Jonathan Dyer-USA TODAY Sports /
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Phillies fans have a long season ahead; can* now indulge in reckless alcohol abuse

The universally renowned cordial and gregarious Philadelphia sports fans will be rewarded for their decades of patience and calm this season. For the first time, Citizens Bank Park will expand their alcohol menu by serving wine and cocktails in addition to Yuengling and flavorless-light-beer-X.

Here are the details, per Philly.com:

"But in a first this season, the Phillies and Aramark will sell cocktails and wine on the main concourse’s general concession areas at Citizens Bank Park. If you think that the idea of a “Phillies bar” is coming from somewhere out of left field – well, you’re correct. It will be located behind Section 142, expanding an existing beer bar. Wine and cocktails cannot be brought out to seats. The cocktail list has not been finalized."

This good (or very, very bad) news comes off the eve of the “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” Season 10 finale, likely saving the city from complete and utter implosion.  Well timed, Phillies marketing team.

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We are on the cusp of some dark, tumultuous times for the Phillies organization and their very tame fan base.  The team is forecast to have one of their most dreary seasons in franchise history. Cole Hamels is wearing red pinstripes on borrowed time, Ryan Howard will cash $25 million on the year, and Las Vegas has the Phillies projected to be victorious just 67 times season, while clocked at 500/1 odds at taking the World Series (and 250/1 to win the pennant). For context, the second worst odds to hoist the Commissioner’s Trophy are with the Diamondbacks at 125/1. So, by the transitive property, the Phillies are four times as bad as the second worst team in baseball.

But, hey, nevermind all that!  Booze!

Fans can now forget about their team’s 16 meetings with the Washington Nationals by guzzling Long Island ice teas; or, for the more sophisticated female sports fan, sip a fine chilled Riesling.  The daring and devoted will be offered the option to drink Phillies brand wine:

"Wine and spirits have been served previously at non-Aramark restaurants, such as McFadden’s, as well as in premium seating areas and at the sit-down restaurant Harry the K’s.A Phillies-branded wine (not Bobby), a dry red created in partnership with Chaddsford Winery, will be among the offerings. Chaddsford also produces a branded wine for the Flyers."

Meanwhile in St. Louis, Cardinal fans are tucking their top lips and nursing Budweiser’s dressed in “The Cardinal Way” coasters while shaking their heads in disapproval.

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