original Air Jordan III was released way back in 1988, when the idea of blogs hadn'..."/> original Air Jordan III was released way back in 1988, when the idea of blogs hadn'..."/>

The Air Jordan III Retro Release Is A Thing Of Beauty

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via Nike.com

The original Air Jordan III was released way back in 1988, when the idea of blogs hadn’t even dipped their toes into Bill Gates’ yet-to-be descended testicles. But tomorrow, the legendary sneaker re-releases once again, this time in extraordinary fashion by way of full black leather construction that only a bafflingly dull eye could pass up.

Seriously, this is one of those rare sneaker releases where little fault can be found. Usually I can find something, anything to complain about — an unnecessary color here, an unnecessary accent there, or something relatively insignificant to nitpick, such as the color of the Jumpman logo on the tongue.

But with these, I’m left without any semblance of criticism. This reworked, refined edition of the Jordan III could be worn pretty much anywhere. Hell, they could even serve as formalwear, assuming the wedding or lavish gala you’re attending involves a couple under the combined age of 76.

Now right here is where an overeager sneaker head complains and says that these are way too plain and could use a hit of orange, a little lightning blue, and a dizzying dose of brick red across the side in order to properly slice through the clutter. Or something that simply screams “paint splat.”

Nah. Take one look at the magic here and tell me if those shoes need anything:

via Nike.com

Waiting… waiting… exactly.

Beauty is more often found in carefully constructed simplicity than it is in overdone extravagance.

If you don’t see that here, you’re probably wearing one of those unholy home/away jerseys of your favorite NFL player as you prepare for the big weekend.

A quick trip to Famous Footwear for some sweet Sketcher Lows sounds like the obvious next step.

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Previously: Reebok’s Ugliest Sneaker Release Ever?
Previously: The Ridiculous Air McFlys Are Finally Here
Previously: This Week In Sports Apparel: Incredibly Ugly Yeezys Stole The Show
Previously: This Week In Sports Apparel: Terrible Sneakers And Hats

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For more unapologetic mockery and utter nonsense, follow Tim Ryan on Twitter and Instagram.