The Curry 2 Finally Found A Friend In The Barkley Air Max “Triple Whites”

Remember back in June when Under Armour released the now infamous “Curry 2s”? The dreadful but hilarious “dad sneakers” were instantaneously mocked on Twitter for a good 48 hours, and to a merciless degree.

It was a grand old time for all parties involved; even for dads, who quickly went out and purchased a pair. [No, seriously. Those things Sold. Out.]

I’m pretty sure every other tweet in my feed during that fateful time span was a brutal knock on the Chef Curry Lows, either in the form of a one-liner or a photoshop.

Kinda like, well, this:

Hell, even Tom Brady — who has an endorsement deal with UGG of all shoe brands — had the nerve to get in on the action with some expert trolling.

I remain amazed by the fact that Brady even Sharpie’d in “Straight Fire” on the tip of his shoe, so as to drive home the point that he was most certainly in on the joke.

The savage beating finally reached its culmination when the Crying Jordan face inevitably draped itself across the toe box, ultimately putting the god damn joke to rest after a couple days of incessant mockery.

But now? Now it very much appears as though the Curry 2 has a new, much needed friend in Nike’s “Air Max CB34 Triple Whites,” also known as the Charles Barkley shoe.

Have you taken a good look at these freakin’ things?

via SneakerNews

My. God.

If the Curry 2 was an accidental “dad sneaker,” the Triple White CB34 is most certainly a “mom sneaker.” Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Moms across the world should be on Nike’s radar, just not under the Charles Barkley umbrella.

Because nothing — absolutely nothing — about this shoe says Charles Barkley.

All it says to me is that Aunt Dorothy finally found her comfy cross trainers.

In the past, the CB34 had been released in an array of different colors, but never in all white. And holy shit, now I see why.

But a silver lining does exist, because if there’s one person out there with the balls to mock his own shoes at the expense of the company that pays him to wear said shoes, it’s Sir Charles.

A colorful rant on TNT’s Inside the NBA would be delightful.

Or, at the very least, Ernie, Kenny and Shaq need to troll the living hell out of Chuck and wear them to the studio as soon as possible.

*****

For more unapologetic honesty and fascinating nonsense, follow Tim Ryan on Twitter and Instagram.