Here’s 5 NFL teams even Bill Belichick couldn’t make win

Oh, you knew the No. 1 team on this list was going to be the Detroit Lions. Welcome to football Siberia. The Lions are one of two non-expansion teams in NFL history to have never played in a Super Bowl. Since Belichick was five-years-old living in Annapolis, Maryland while his dad was an assistant coach for the Naval Academy, the Lions have won two playoff games. Two. That’s it.

The Lions have played in the NFC North since 2002 and have never won the division. They can’t get anything right, as it took years for the Pontiac Silverdome to finally be demolished. As long as the Ford Family is in charge, the Lions will be run like an assembly line of designed to perpetuate suck and nothing more.

The only way Belichick could ever win anything with the Lions is if he were to burn everything to the ground, move the entire franchise to St. Louis and call them the Stallions. If you’re a superstar player for the Lions, you retire prematurely willingly. The Lions broke Barry Sanders, they broke Calvin Johnson and they 100 percent will break Belichick because that is what they do to people.

Next: 30 richest players in the NFL

For two seasons in the late 1970s, Belichick was on the Lions coaching staff. After leaving for the Denver Broncos in 1978, they have won one playoff game. He doesn’t need to coach the Lions, as Belichick sent a probe to spy on Detroit in Matt Patricia. It’s not going well for Belichick’s former defensive coordinator thus far. The only thing the Lions are good at is playing on Thanksgiving.