Pete Carroll miraculously sounds satisfied with Seahawks QB situation

Pete Carroll is somehow cool with the dire quarterback situation for the Seattle Seahawks.

Armed with the likes of Drew Lock, Geno Smith and Jacob Eason, Pete Carroll is ready to take on the NFL world with his holy triumvirate of Seattle Seahawks quarterbacks.

Though all three were very notable signal-callers in college, people are wondering why the Seahawks have not taken a quarterback this spring through the NFL Draft. It may be a weak draft for the position, but seemingly all other quarterback-desperate teams (Atlanta Falcons, Carolina Panthers, Pittsburgh Steelers, Washington Commanders) have all acquired one. Carroll is probably not taking one now.

There is only one logical explanation for this sort of madness by the greatest gum chewer Seattle sports has ever seen: 70-year-old Pete Carroll is going full-blown Martyball this fall, baby!

Pete Carroll plans to lead the NFL in rushing with this Seattle Seahawks offense

In an attempt to take things back to the first Bush Administration, Carroll is going for broke with the most elite offensive game plan that never won a Super Bowl: Run, run, pass, punt. Though the combination of Reggie Bush and LenDale White worked wonderfully at USC, as well as trading for Marshawn Lynch at the professional level in a deal with the Buffalo Bills, it is 2022, not 2005.

If Seattle wants to buck the trend of this whole newfangled throwing-the-ball-forward thing, the 2022 Seahawks will go 11-6 by winning every game they do by hitting the under. Ball control is the only way to control the pace of a game. Like gum, it is all about chewing some clock. Kenneth Walker will go from winning the Doak Walker Award at Michigan State to becoming a 2,000-yard rusher.

Rather than focusing on their need at quarterback, the Seahawks instead focused on their need to fortify the run game as well as their defense, the latter being emphasized by their Day 3 selections.

Even if Carroll somehow takes a quarterback in the seventh round of the draft, he better be of the option variety. Look for him to go way off the board and get some of the best of the best of the best, sir … with honors! from a military academy. As soon as Lock, Smith or Eason sail the pigskin past a wide open receiver on third down, Carroll is going Power I even when it is third-and-forever.

It will be an incredibly painful rebuild season in the Pacific Northwest, so give the 12s some Martyball!