Meltdown Tuesday: WTF is up with CFB

Verderame: The NFL is also seeing some wild stuff. What is the story with the Falcons? Are they cooked?

Bass: Pretty much. They’re the opposite of “Rise Up.” Matty Luke Warm killed them against the Colts.

Verderame: Is Matt Ryan closer to Tom Brady or Ryan Tannehill? I feel like people make him out to be elite, but he’s highly mediocre.

Bass: He’s more of a Jay Fiedler type. He’ll get you to the playoffs and not much more. Fiedler without the big ears.

Verderame: Wow, that’s a tough shot. Atlanta should be much better than it is, but that franchise can never figure it out. Leaves us one option. CONTRACTION.

Bass: Shut your damn mouth. Just wait until the 1 BILLION DOLLAR mansion on the hill pops up. 1 Billion for that mess. Fucking Arthur Blank is probably the greatest man at holding a city hostage this side of Mussolini. He’s basically the Bizarro version of Walt Disney.

Verderame: They should just move the team to a city that actually cares about sports. That’s the only thing that is saving Matt Ryan and the Falcons. Nobody pays enough attention to know what the hell is going on.

Bass: I kid you not, it is the NICEST media you’ll ever come across. And that’s not a knock on their media, just a blunt statement. People love the Birds down there, though.

Verderame: If the Falcons don’t make the playoffs after that start and with their joke of a schedule, the Falcons have to be considered massive chokers.

Bass: They’re playing better than was expected, which doesn’t say much for the franchise really. But I’ll play along. You wanna move them? Move them up to Cobb County so they can play with the Braves. FML.

Verderame: Those boys ought to just get together and see who can have the bigger meltdown. Alright, finally, let’s roll to the 49ers. Is that the biggest disgrace in sports or what? Nice job with the Colin Kaepernick deal.

Bass: What’s up with the state of California? Do all the teams just side with inept General Managers over coaches that are actually, you know, good. Same thing happened with the Chargers years back. What’s up with the state of California? Do all the teams just side with inept General Managers over coaches that are actually, you know, good. Same thing happened with the Chargers years back. They should straight up strip Super Bowl 50 from the Niners because of their persistent dumbfuckery.

Verderame: Just move the damn game to the Rose Bowl or something. Better yet, invite the front office out to the 50-yard line before the game. Let everybody just laugh and/or boo wildly.

Bass: They should just parade those clowns through the street. Strip them naked and make them walk from Market Street all the way to Santa Clara while the pissed off people of SF hurl feces, rocks and insults.

sdaffd

Verderame:I think that’s fair. How do you go from four straight title games to this so quickly? Fire everyone.

Bass: Yup. Everyone goes. Let Harbaugh deliver the pink slips.

Verderame: We have melted down.

Bass: