A proposal for Richard Jefferson now that he is retired

Dear Richard Jefferson,

You don’t mind me calling you RJ, do you? I want to start this off on familiar terms, but given the nature of this proposal I don’t feel comfortable calling you “Dick.”

That’s just a joke. We like to get a little friendly here. It’s what we do. We like to laugh, and share, and maybe poke a little fun. We strive bring entertainment to a group of people who want a little something to make their world a more joyful place. However, as the following tweet may indicate, we’ve found a sort of entertainment that we’re not providing in adequate measure:

That’s a big number, and that number is not a coincidence. Clearly there is a substantial overlap with this particular audience and NBA fans, and that means clearly there is are people we’re not tapping.

More from NBA

• Predicting NBA’s Christmas Day Schedule: Lakers, Warriors highlight slate of postseason rematches
• 3 reasons the Blazers should trade Damian Lillard to the Heat and 2 reasons they shouldn’t
• LeBron James, Giannis, Damian Lillard all want that Mbappé money
• Jaylen Brown signs richest contract in NBA history without a left hand
• NBA rumors: Pistons determined to trade Killian Hayes

I understand this may seem a little forward, a little awkward. We’re not asking you to showcase this sort of entertainment yourself; that would be rude and possibly illegal. This site is about the words first and only, and this proposal is about exposure. Writing exposure, I should clarify.

Why are we coming to you about this? We saw this from your interview after Game 7 on Sunday in which you spoke of your plans in retirement:

"“That’s all I’m going to do, is write essays.”“They might be erotic. I don’t know.”"

We can help you, RJ, and we think you’re the man to help us offer a better, fuller package.

In our forthcoming Friendly Endings section, we will team you with a group of writers and editors to help your flesh out your titillating missives. 

For starters, we’ve already work shopped a few concepts that we think might invigorate your passion. Writing passion, I should clarify.

Fifty Shades of RJ

A weekly serial devoted to a debonair man named Rickon Jetson who is about to enter a new chapter of his life, and has more money and time than he knows what to do with.

Too close to home? No problem. We can broaden the scope, maybe generalize it some.

Going Down in the DMs

A work of new wave writing in the vein of the movie Unfriended except instead of being awful, it isn’t.

Too specific? Maybe too mechanical? Not an issue. Maybe you want to reach out to the Cavalier hometown, give them something more to be proud of.

Cleavage-land

Sexy.

RJ. Richard. Friend. This is your shot. With your consent, we can get this party bus rolling. Retirement is a scary thing. Whether you want to be or not, you’re in an entirely new world now. Your services are going to be called upon in a variety of fields by a variety of people. All we’re hoping is that you consider servicing us. Service us by writing, I should clarify.

Hit us back on Twitter.

Much Love,

The Friendly Bounce Team