One crazy trade every NBA team should make

23. Charlotte Hornets

Two words.

More Bojangles.

Two more words.

For me.

I used to live in North Carolina for a while. I miss a few things. Vinegar-y barbecue was a treat. Diet Cheerwine was also nice. But besides the excellent linguistic department at North Carolina State University, there’s not much I miss more than Bojangles.

This is a problem because it’s fatty and bad for you. Also, the nearest location is states away. There’s no Waffle House in Michigan either. We only recently got Sonic. This is both a crime and criminal. What’s wrong with us?

Well, 30 sliders are about changing the world for the better. I’m about to kill two hungers with one trade.

Boban Marjonovic is potentially useful either as a basketball player or a novelty. The Hornets don’t have much going on at the center spot. Sure, Cody Zeller can give you some decent minutes, but Roy Hibbert is a fathead of 2013 Roy Hibbert, Spencer Hawes is a grating human being, and Frank Kaminsky is better as a Skittles spokesman than he is as a professional basketball player. To be fair to Kaminsky, he did set that bar pretty high.

You know who can reach high things? Boban. He’s 7’3 and his hands make a Skittle look like a mini-Skittle which don’t exist but should. Walker and Marjonovic forming a pick and roll combo named Kemboban would be worth any price.

Boban Marjonovic to the Charlotte Hornets for five Bojangles franchises in Metro Detroit and one in Gaylord on the west side of I-75. Take them from Chapel Hill. They don’t deserve them.