Fansided

Kobe Bryant to play in BIG 3 next season per co-founder Jeff Kwatinetz

By Matt Rutkowski

COLUMBUS, OH - MARCH 30: Kobe Bryant watches semifinal game of the 2018 NCAA Division I Women's Basketball Final Four at Nationwide Arena on March 30, 2018 in Columbus, Ohio. Notre Dame defeated Connecticut 91-89 to advance to the National Championship. (Photo by Justin Tafoya/NCAA Photos via Getty Images)
COLUMBUS, OH - MARCH 30: Kobe Bryant watches semifinal game of the 2018 NCAA Division I Women's Basketball Final Four at Nationwide Arena on March 30, 2018 in Columbus, Ohio. Notre Dame defeated Connecticut 91-89 to advance to the National Championship. (Photo by Justin Tafoya/NCAA Photos via Getty Images) /
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Kobe Bryant, best known for the worst shooting season in the history of the NBA and also playing on the Lakers for some time, is set to play in the BIG3 next year. Whoa!

That’s enough, guys. No more calling Kobe Bryant hurtful names like “Kobe ‘Has Bean’ Bryant” or “Whack Mamba.” He’s finally going to take on the true professional basketball league in this here country of the United S of A: the BIG3. Co-founder Jeff Kwatinetz announced this earlier Thursday afternoon on the weekly BIG3 conference call. Don’t believe me? Here. Have a tweet.

Tweetacular! The 3’s don’t get much bigger than this. In fact, might be the largest name yet to join the BIG3 player base if you discount Carlos Boozer. Most people do.

Kobe is still revered as the most important human being in the history of the 23rd chromosome in parts of Southern California. “Think about it,” they say. “Humans have 23 pairs of chromosomes, but Kobe Bryant’s number is 24. That means he’s the evolution of humanity. That’s why ever since Kobe was born everything in the world has been perfect.” You can try responding at that point, but I recommend against it.

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So how well will Kobe’s game transfer to the BIG3? Having two fewer people not to pass to should help a bit, but let’s dig deeper. The last time we saw him he was scoring 60 points in an NBA game. If we look back a littler further than that, we see the worst shooting season in the history of the NBA. I can’t recall if I’ve mentioned that yet. Going back a little further, Kobe Bryant was born on  August 23, 1978 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, so really it’s anyone’s guess.

My guess is that he will continue to have five rings. That is just so many. It’s probably too many to count, so don’t bother.